I don’t want to talk about Udinese. Nothing you can say will make me feel better. In fact, I’ll just get angrier.
They’re shit. Absolute shit.
I don’t care where they are in the table (possibly not for long, Napoli play Juventus later today), they’re garbage. They don’t play with heart anymore. They don’t play with desire. They lack passione.
To borrow from my father: there’s no fantasia.
The worst part is, I’m not angry for the reasons that you may think. Truth be told, my despair comes from this: I miss the Udinese of a few years ago; midtable, who lost to small teams but became Davids when it came to the Goliaths. They were something to be proud of, something to be excited for.
I am not talking about the scoreline. I have seen them lose 1 – 0 and my heart still swelled with pride with how well they played. No, this is about their lethargic, uninspiring, waltzing about.
I miss Udinese, I don’t know where they’ve gone and worse, I don’t know how to get them back.
The best I can do right now (my father already has the angry-letter-writing-campaign side of things covered; he received a letter from La Gazzetta dello Sport asking him nicely to please stop writing) is to do what I do whenever I am down: blare Blur’s Tender, painfully loud.
I have attributed the song to TFC before (see: http://www.90minutesofhopp.com/2011/07/tender.html), but really, I put it on when I’m upset about anything. And today was Udinese turn.
However, there is a difference between Tender for TFC and Tender for Udinese. For TFC, it’s a song of hope, a song of future redemption. For Udinese, it’s a song of mourning, a song of love lost. I’m not, “waiting for that feeling to come;” it came already, and it has past. What I’m waiting for is for it to come back. Not to me, but to the team.
While I used the chorus for TFC, there’s a more significant part of the song to apply to Udinese:
Tender is the night/Lying by your side
Tender is the touch/Of someone that you love too much
Tender is the day/The demons go away
Lord I need to find/Someone who can heal my mind
That’s where we are at right now. They’re so close to being the Little Zebras that I know and love. The Little Zebras that are written about in shock and surprise. The Little Zebras that were once called “The Little Barcelona.” I know you can get back there, I just need you to realize it too. Udinese, I need you to care again. I need you to understand that I’m not angry/heartbroken/on my knees because of score lines. I am because you’re better than this. I need you to prove it to me. I need you to heal my mind.
Damon is right: love’s the greatest thing.
Post script: I wouldn’t be writing this if it wasn’t for love.